yosemite.

My husband is supervising a project in Yosemite. It started two weeks ago, and has another week left. We took the RV up to Groveland, camped out the first week with the kids, the second week just the two of us, and the whole clan back up again Sunday.
The RV park has a swimming pool, playground and full hook ups including Bravo, so I got to keep updated on my reality tv obsession while the kids were napping. The RV has bunk beds inside, plus a queen size bed, a full size bed and a twin.....sweet deal for the 5 of us. While Joe was at work, we played, swam, explored, painted & colored. I had so much fun, probably just as much as they did. On the week that it was just Joe and I, I did some hiking up to the waterfalls, and around the park. It is so beautiful there, with great weather. We also saw a bear every single day we were in yosemite. There is a meadow there that the brown bears love to be in. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to get any good pictures of them. There was a sign that said that last year, 29 bears were killed in yosemite by cars, so sad. But I did get some great pictures of the deer we saw, so beautiful. A baby buck came right up to me and started sniffing my shorts. I didn't touch him, because I was afraid to scare him but it was amazing. Totally hit home how disgusting it is that people shoot these creatures for fun. sick.
But here are some photos from my phone from our trip, I don't have very many of the kiddos on here those are on the camera and I don't feel like dealing with it right now.

we play.

I am a big fan of playing with my kids. There will always be housework that needs to be done, and laundry to fold....but childhood goes by fast, and children grow even faster so I can deal with a messy (not dirty) house and play along the way. I mean, who wouldn't want to play dress up with the most adorable 2 year old girl instead of steam cleaning the tile? and it would be crazy to not play transformers with Mason instead of scrubbing the toilet....and hide and seek with Rowan, nothings better than that.
So here are a few photos from "play time".
enjoy.

call me red.

I loved it. Then I showered, and it faded...heavily.
Then I re-dyed it, went swimming. Crap.
We left to go camping, I've been swimming every day.....crap crap crap.
chlorine+new red hair=crap

to be vegan or not to be.....

I was sitting outside on the hammock and reading a blog of a person who is vegan. Every single time I read about veganism, or have a chit chat with my BFF Hayley, I get the urge and motivation to cut out dairy and live vegan.
I did, while I was pregnant with Rowan and until he was about 6-7 months old, maybe a whole year in whole? It was tough, and I could tell you every excuse why I haven't gone back, but I miss it. I really do.
maybe.
we'll see.

TMI

warning: this is a post about womanly issues


I got an IUD after having Rowan.
I was terrified to get pregnant again, as London was only 5 months old when I found out I was expecting with Rowan & I was exclusively nursing AND on the pill.
Fertile Myrtle.
I didn't do to much research on it other than I knew that it was very very effective and I am very very forgetful and obviously the pill wasn't working for me.
I received lots of flack from family members when we discussed the IUD, concerning the invasiveness of it that it can cause permanent damage, that it can cause abortions and so forth.
But......I still got it.
And, since then:
I have been on a complete & total emotional roller coaster
Depressed.
Total lack of desire to do anything, and by anything you can guess what that means.
My dr. told me they don't know exactly how the IUD works, well I can tell you how it works, refer to the previous sentence.
My cycle has been more jacked up then I can even describe.
My face looks like a 12 year boys going through puberty
I feel guilty that I ever got it.
I am having a really hard time losing weight, and I have been watching my diet and exercising.
I am making an appointment tomorrow to have it removed.
I am going to go back on the pill, and never looking back.

void.

I need some more Jesus in my life. Majorly lacking. I have been trying to fill this void with everything I can possible think of, instead of just asking the person who would just die (He already did) to be in my life more. Funny how we do that sometimes. What's not so funny, is the time lost, and the gunk that builds up in our lives from going astray. I will be cleaning house, and not just the kitchen this time.

tradition.

I have written and deleted what I had here like a 4 times..........

I want a more traditional family. Don't mistaken this for conservative...Traditional. I didn't have many traditions growing up except ones that revolved around the holidays, and I want more than that for my children.

I want to bake with my kids every weak
Make home made pizzas on Saturday nights.
Turn off the damn Tv and get my kids outside every day.
I want to stop stressing out over such small things and just relax and enjoy these 3 monsters of mine.
I want them to think about their childhood, and feel blessed and not just relieved they are past it.
I want them to grow up and have children and positively say to their own children "this is what I did with my mother...."
I want to set a time aside every day to just play with my kids, no cleaning, just playing.
I want to not yell when I am upset
I want to enjoy bathtime and bedtime instead of freaking out that someone pee'd in the water, or is running around naked, and just laugh at it
I want to buy bikes so that we can ride them to school together in the mornings
I want to make a decent breakfast every morning and sit and enjoy it with my kids and talk about what kind of day we want to have
I want to pray with them more
I want to change.
I need to do the above.